4 Questions To Ask Before Preparing For a Home Birth

GUEST BLOG: BY SARAH AT FEARLESS CALM HYPNOBIRTHING

You’ve looked into your options, and you’re thinking of having a home birth. But everyone you know has had their babies in hospital, so you have no idea where to start with your preparations!

Don’t worry, here are my top 4 things to consider when preparing for a home birth.

What do I want my birth environment to be like?

If you’re thinking of having a home birth, it’s likely that you’ve already got an idea in your head of where in your house you want your main birthing space to be set up (although of course, one of the advantages of birthing at home is that you can move between rooms if you wish). However, the birth environment is about much more than just which room you are in.

For example, when birthing, it is important to have low lighting as much as possible to help keep the oxytocin (birth hormone) flowing. You might want to prepare fairy lights or electronic tea lights as well as any lamps you might be using to help to set the mood.

If you are going to want to listen to music or hypnobirthing relaxation tracks, think about how these will be played and make sure your birth partner is aware so they can take charge of this on the day! The smell of the space can also be very important for some people, so you might want to prepare a room spray or essential oils that could help you to relax further.

Do I still need to pack a home birth bag?

This is similar to what would traditionally be called a ‘hospital bag’, although I like to think of it more as a ‘birth kit’. What do you need to help you to have a positive birth? Thinking about your environment, or otherwise? Snacks are always a good idea!

It’s a good idea to get everything together in a bag or box, so that when the time comes for you to birth your baby, your birth partner or midwives can access everything you need quickly and easily. Think home comforts such as your favourite cosy socks and convenience items such as bendy straws and headband headphones!

What equipment might I need?

Thankfully, if you are in the UK, your home birth midwives will provide much of the necessary equipment (and you can always ask them if you are not sure). However, some optional extras you may need to organise yourself, for example a TENS machine. You can usually find these on the high street in Boots or many other pharmacies. They are also sometimes listed on sites such as Facebook Marketplace. Amazon have a good range too - make sure you buy a maternity version with 4 pads instead of 2 - typically used for back pain - such as this one by Baby Care.

Birth pools are another popular choice for managing surges at home. You may be able to access one for free through your local NHS trust, or alternatively there may be a low-cost rental scheme in your area. For example, where I live we are lucky to have access to the Leeds/Wakefield Community Birth Pool Hire Scheme, which is an affordable alternative to purchasing a pool yourself.

What will be my ‘back-up plan’ and how will this make me feel?

If, for whatever reason, plans change and home birth is no longer an option, it is worth having already thought about your options as a back-up plan. Feeling well prepared for any scenario will help you to feel empowered and calm about your upcoming birth. It might help to discuss this with your midwife, as they may know more about local options and suggest something that you haven’t thought of (for example, a local birth centre).

Furthermore, hypnobirthing classes really can help you to prepare for any eventuality, remaining calm and relaxed when things perhaps seem to be going off plan. Don’t forget to invest in your birth preparation as an essential!

Written by Sarah at Fearless Calm Hypnobirthing

Hi, I'm Sarah Horton, certified hypnobirthing teacher and birth enthusiast! 

I have been teaching since 2014 when I qualified as a primary school teacher, but after the birth of my daughter in 2019 I was inspired to train as a hypnobirthing teacher. I felt so lucky to have found hypnobirthing for my daughter's birth and I wanted to share it with as many people as possible!

I went from feeling worried and anxious about birth to feeling prepared and even excited to birth my baby. This might sound strange to you if you've not heard much about hypnobirthing before, but there's a lot more to it than just breathing techniques (although you will learn some of those too!)

I offer courses both online and in person (in and around my local area of Fitzwilliam, Pontefract, West Yorkshire). You can find out more about me and the services I offer at www.fearlesscalmhypnobirthing.com

How To Choose A Hypnobirthing Course

HOW TO CHOOSE A HYPNOBIRTHING COURSE

You’ve heard whispers in the air that hypnobirthing is worth exploring, but a quick google leaves you baffled. With new instructors and companies appearing all the time, how do you choose a hypnobirthing instructor or a course?

Face to face vs online

Most instructors offer face to face sessions (or did pre-COVID!) but some companies have set up online courses to work through at your own pace. Of course, right now many instructors might be working online to deliver sessions via video call. What we’re really talking about here is the difference between a live instructor, getting to know you and your birth partner, versus ‘one size fits all’ online learning modules.

Live instructors will have taken the time to research your proposed maternity unit and will know how to adapt the techniques to suit the policies in different birthing places. If they are local to you, they will more than likely have experience in teaching other parents-to-be using the same maternity services or home birth team. Some instructors will even have links to the staff in local NHS trusts, giving them further insight into how you might need to adapt your hypnobirthing strategies according to how things work near you.

Pre-recorded video courses often come with a downloadable workbook and MP3s. They are usually cheaper and you can be more flexible with the time you spend on learning, fitting it in when you please.

“Be aware of online courses that don’t tailor their content to you, your individual experiences and circumstances,” says Georgia Mathieu from Birth Easy with Georgia  “Instructors need to be able to spend time understanding the birth you want and helping you to create that, but also helping you to understand how to deal with things if that plan has to change. Knowledge of how your local maternity services work is a real advantage here, as everywhere has a slightly different policy.”

Group or Private Hypnobirthing Sessions?

This all depends on you. Group courses can be sociable and are usually held at convenient times, though these aren’t always suitable for those with children to look after or people who work different shifts each week. A great advantage though is the support network that is often left over once the course finishes. Many instructors will advise you stay in touch through a private Whatsapp group, or similar, so that you can let each other know how you get on.

Private sessions are usually more expensive, but there is less time spent on checking in with each couple and the learning is really personalised to your own needs.

“With private sessions, the sessions can be tailored to you.” says Georgia. For example, some couples need to overcome trauma, others already know some of the content, so we can tailor it to meet your needs. Plus, we can master techniques together and make the content personal to you as we progress through the course."

What about the books and apps?

More recently, an abundance of books and apps have appeared on the hypnobirthing scene, seemingly offering a cheaper way to learn. There are some fantastic books available, but don’t forget you’ll only be getting that one-size-fits-all approach. With a book, there’s little room for personalisation. What works for one person doesn’t always work for others, especially when using visualisations and self-hypnosis, which can be pretty dependent on your own prior experiences. A book won’t be able to tailor content just to you.

Hypnobirthing apps, such as the Freya app, claim to help you with breathing techniques for birth. What you actually get is a generic contraction timer with optional background music and a hypnosis track over the top. It can be useful, especially if you’ve already taken a course and know how to use it, how to breathe and when to switch to something else. However, as a starting point or stand-alone resource, it’s unlikely to help you through your labour unlike the advice and guidance of a fully trained and accredited instructor.

Georgia Mathieu agrees. "Put it this way...you can read a book on how to swim, or you can jump straight into the water. It's much the same for Hypnobirthing. You can read a book or download an app, or you can book a course with an instructor!” she says.

So how do I choose an instructor?

The hypnobirthing world is full of a range of different style instructors. Many make the link between the mind and body, working with mindfulness techniques, encouraging positivity and calm. Others teach more evidence-based methods, having looked at studies and current research to find out how to make hypnobirthing more effective. For hypnobirthing to work best, you need to trust in what you’re hearing and feel comfortable asking questions. It’s important to choose an instructor aligned with your own values. The great news is, there are plenty of us out there!

Top Tips

•   Find a face-to-face instructor, even if they’re teaching online during the pandemic

• Avoid generic video courses offering no personalisation

• Local instructors may know more about maternity units near you, but out-of-area instructors might seem like a better match for you. Find the right balance.

• Don’t substitute the experience and expertise of an instructor for a book or an app

Georgia Mathieu

is a Birth Educator and Breech Birth Specialist who works to empower couples to take control of their birth experience.

You can find her at BirthEasyWithGeorgia.co.uk, on Facebook and on Instagram.

Birth Story: Water hypnobirth @ St Mary's Hospital, Manchester.

I’ve previously loved to share the birth stories of my couples on this blog, but this time it’s my turn! Here’s the story of how I birthed my baby boy, Ellis, in November 2020 at St Mary’s Hospital in Manchester.

I had well and truly had enough of waiting.

We found out about this pregnancy just 5 days before the first national lockdown in March.  I worked from home and felt quite isolated for my whole pregnancy. Most family and friends never even saw my bump! There was still so much uncertainty over the impact of coronavirus on pregnant women and their babies, so we stayed well away from everyone for most of the summer. I’m sure you can appreciate that I had no desire for relaxation, nesting at home or reflection once maternity leave officially hit... I’d spent 8 full months at home – waiting and worrying!

Thinking of the great future birthday party potential, I told the baby it had to be here for Halloween. I was so disappointed when the trick or treaters came and went without so much as a hint of anything starting up.

My waters broke.

I woke up 2 days later in the early hours with some tightening of my bump that had become common over the previous few nights. I hobbled to the toilet for the last time at about 3am, noting that I was a bit more uncomfortable than usual. Was I waddling? Something felt new, but at just 37 weeks pregnant it was so unlikely that anything serious was really happening, even though I’d hoped and prayed for an end to the backache, sleepless nights and tiredness of late pregnancy!  At 6.10am I felt that bizarre but familiar trickle of waters breaking.  I shot out of bed and ran back to the bathroom.  

Thunderbirds are go!

An important lesson from my first labour was that I needed to immediately remain calm and relaxed. With my first, my waters broke but the contractions never came, likely due to such a rush of adrenaline and excitement! This led to a medical induction which was something I was keen to avoid again.  My waters had broken at 11pm last time, after a very busy day! There was no time for sleep before being induced the next morning. By the time I gave birth, I’d been awake for over 30 hours - another factor I was keen not to repeat.

This time I’d hoped for a spontaneous start to the labour, not only because of the COVID restrictions in the hospital making induction a lonely process, but because I wanted to move around, bounce on a ball and hopefully use a birth pool for pain relief. I knew most of that would not be possible with a medical induction, where I’d be required to sit still and have continuous monitoring of my baby’s heart rate. Standing in the bathroom, not quite believing what was happening, I shouted my husband, Tim.

He had already jumped out of bed and we stood in the bathroom grinning. Both of us were so pleased this was happening after a full night of sleep! I decided I’d jump in a nice warm shower whilst he called my mum to come to be with our daughter. This was one big relief too – throughout the pandemic we’d been planning for who would look after our 2 year old daughter when labour began. Would it be safe to leave her with friends round the corner? Would my mum make it in time from work? Amazingly, I’d gone into labour just as she was getting ready to leave the house, so she simply had to drive to us instead!

Early labour.

As I showered, I noticed a few period pains come and go. By the time my mum arrived 30 minutes later, our daughter was awake. We packed the final bits for the car and I looked at some crumpets for a while… The mild period pains were coming regularly now, once every 10 mins or so, but with things going quickly last time, I wanted to be in my safe space at the hospital before things really got going. We had final hugs goodbye and left.

I’d heard people talk about that last moment. You hug your only child for the last time because when you return, she’s no longer your only world.  She doesn’t know, of course! She just takes the hug, carries on playing with a train track and shouts “Have a nice daaaay!”, thrilled to be spending time with Grandma on her own. I had a heavy heart – how would my first child cope with having a sibling? Had we prepared her enough? There was such a strange feeling of this being a huge moment of transition, yet she was so blissfully unaware.

There wasn’t much time to dwell on this. I had another cramping pain and remembered that I really wanted to get to the hospital. When should you go to the hospital when you’re in labour? The rational side of my brain knew we had time, but the slightly annoying side, which tends to remind me of the things I’m worried about, was telling me to just get there as soon as possible.

You might think that as a hypnobirthing instructor I’d have been keen to have a home birth and in a way, I was. But then we had the discussions. Firstly, my husband, who knows me better than anyone else, told me he thought I’d panic. And he was right. The idyllic scene of having a birth pool set up in the living room, unlimited birth partners and our daughter milling around quietly was like a perfect dream. But in reality would I cope? I know how important it is to relax through contractions for comfort, speed and pain control. I teach this week in, week out! So ultimately, we decided I’d be able to do that best in somewhere I perceived as a safe space. Somewhere where all of my last minute ‘what ifs’ were manageable. Given the difficulties we’d experienced the first time round, there would be many ‘what ifs’.  Perhaps our living room wasn’t the best place for me. No matter how many fairy lights and perfectly written birth affirmations hung around the room, it would not feel, to me with my personal medical history, like the safe space I knew the hospital could be.

The second conversation was with a midwife. My daughter had been born in compound presentation – her hand and arm were born with her head, flying superman style. Now I had no problems whatsoever pushing her out. In fact, I didn’t know any different as I didn’t know that she was presenting that way as I gave birth… but the midwife had confirmed that this could happen again and that it can often lead to the need for further intervention and potentially an emergency situation.  This cemented my choice of birth place as St Mary’s Hospital in Manchester.

What were the odds?

The hospital recently moved the Midwife Led Unit to Wythenshawe Hospital where it is now called The Manchester Birth Centre. For me, this was incredibly disappointing. I did not want to give birth at Wythenshawe for a few different reasons and so my options at St Mary’s were limited to the Delivery Unit where only one birth pool is available. It is, however, an incredible room, painted full of birth affirmations in different languages, soft lighting and furnishings… but there’s only one room like this (or there was at the time!). What were the odds on this being available for me to use? 

All of this played through my mind as we set off in the car. I’d called triage to let them know I was on my way and I’d mentioned the birth pool room.

“It’s in use at the minute but that could change so let’s just see where you’re at when you get here,” said the midwife who assessed me over the phone.

“It won’t be free in time.” I told Tim in the car.

Speed bumps.

There are several routes one could take to reach the hospital from our house but only one that involves navigating several hundred speed bumps and endless traffic light junctions. I’d advise against such roads if you are in labour and trying to relax. Having not really left the house much in 8 months, it struck me as typical that we’d be trying to drive into a major UK city in rush hour whilst in labour. It was the most traffic I’d seen for a long time. Not to worry - I zoned out and used some of that good old hypnobirthing positivity to avoid the panic zone. I’d prepared a playlist for labour but at this point I was happy without it. The period pains were coming and going and I noted every one whilst watching the car clock. Roughly 1 in 8 minutes, but seeming to get closer together and stronger each time. If it wasn’t for my waters breaking, we’d have stayed at home a little longer.

We arrived at the hospital car park sometime around 8am. We debated Tim dropping me off at the door whilst he went to park, but that rational side of my brain was back on top. I decided we should park together and walk across – after all, I’m the one who is always preaching about the need to be active during labour. A common theme was appearing: I knew what I needed to do.

“I’m in labour!”

Because my waters had broken, they continued to leak on our journey! I waddled out of the multi storey into the bright light of a very busy morning, with a big wet patch on the front of my leggings - effortless elegance. A long line of impatient cars, probably staff considering the time, rolled into the car park. We waited by a road crossing as several cars continued across it, ignoring us. Normal people were crossing in between, but a heavily pregnant, leaking, waddling woman wouldn’t have made it across in time before the next car.  A new cramp began, stronger than before, and I instinctively held up my hands at the next car and shouted “I’M IN LABOUR!” before walking straight out into the road. A member of staff smirked at me, but apart from that life continued bustling around us. The hospital campus is busy!

It was so sunny but freezing cold.  I had to stop once to focus on breathing as the tight cramps were becoming more like contractions by this point. I could no longer talk whilst having one, so I knew things were switching up a gear. We made it to the front of the building, like 2 snails. One held up by a baby bump, the other carrying his own body weight in birth bags, snack packs & a pillow. As we waited for the lift on the ground floor, an amused cleaner pushed a wet floor sign towards me, giggled and shouted “Good luck!” through her mask.

A birth affirmation above a door in the St Mary’s Hospital Delivery Unit, Manchester. This is exactly what you need to see when you’re in labour.

By the time we were sitting in triage, I was having those contractions every 3-4 minutes, except now they were stronger and I needed to use my magical breathing techniques to get through them.  We were told to sit in the waiting area, but I wanted to be upright and mobile so stood for a while before using the sofas to lean on. Thankfully it wasn’t long until we were called through.

After confirming that my waters had broken (she took one look at me and declared “Errrr yes, I think we can safely say your waters have broken.”) the midwife placed us on a heart rate monitor for the baby. ‘Oh no, this was exactly what happened last time,’ I thought. There was some worry that I hadn’t felt much movement, but at this time of the day I wouldn’t usually have been feeling much anyway. I’d usually have been in the throes of making breakfast, setting up play spaces or wrestling with a toddler to get her dressed.

Whilst being monitored, a midwife came to assess me further. She was called Leila and she wanted to do an internal examination to find out how far dilated I was. I was pretty set on refusing internal examinations this time round if all went to plan, but as always, I was open minded in case I needed to be! In the moment, this felt like a good time to be examined – if I was as far along as I thought I was, they’d be admitting me soon. I really wanted to get settled into a birthing room so Tim could start dimming the lights, making it comfortable for me. Instead, I was stuck in a tiny, bright triage room.

A shot of orange juice and a piece of toast.

I was gutted when the midwife said I was 3cm. I don’t know why, because I know that it means nothing. It’s something else I teach – birth is not linear. It might take you 3 hours to get to 3cm, but that doesn’t mean it will then take 7 more hours to reach 10cm. There are so many factors. But still, regardless of whether you know that or not, it’s always disappointing.

After a shot of orange juice (why make juice cartons so small?) and a piece of toast, I was feeling regular movements from the baby again. I begged to get off the bed and move around. Here’s the thing – when you’re able to move, you can move through the pain. If you stubbed your toe but had to stay still, you’d be perceiving that pain highly, focusing on it. But you don’t stay still – not naturally. You grab your toe, hop around, swing your leg and make silly noises. And soon, because you were distracted and could do all of those things, the pain is gone. It feels the same in labour. Being made to sit still on the bed was infuriating. Not only did I instinctively want to move, I’d also taken the brilliant ‘Moving for an easier birth’ course with the wonderful Mollie O’Brien at Optimal Birth. I knew what I had to do… again.  As soon as the midwife came back, she agreed that I could come off the monitoring machine…

Then she checked the trace. The baby’s heart rate had taken another dip. I needed to be on the monitor for another 30 minutes. I pleaded with her to be able to stand up. I’ve since told Tim I’m surprised I didn’t shout “I know my rights!” but I think I knew she was on my side. Leila agreed to let me stand, but made me stay next to the monitor. I made Tim do the same. I swayed from side to side. With every contraction, I danced! I probably looked ridiculous, but only Tim could see so I didn’t care. Again, I knew what I had to do. I also used some self-hypnosis, taking myself away to other places in my mind during the contractions. I find it so easy to snap in and out of this and it definitely proved useful as a distraction technique.

The labour pains were getting more intense now. Twice I needed to grab onto Tim’s arms and breathe through the pain slowly. It was working. I was coping. Yet a new midwife entered the room and offered me pain relief. BIG NO. The minute someone offers you pain relief, it sets off a chain reaction of thoughts in your brain. Does she think I need it? Has she seen other women like this who have already taken it? Do I need it? How much longer can I go without it?

Thankfully I stuck to my guns on this. I had no problems taking medical pain relief whatsoever. I’m a firm believer that hypnobirthing goes alongside any of your other birth choices, it doesn’t replace them (unless you want it to). I decided I was coping well and would wait until we were transferred to the birthing room, which was almost ready.

Like a scene from a movie…

The midwife led us round the corridors to our room. Like a scene from a movie, we walked straight past the open doors of the empty, clean birth pool room. There was a slow-motion realisation – it was free! In contrast, the room we’d been allocated, directly next door, was brightly lit, with whitewashed walls and strip lighting beaming down onto a bed in the middle of the room. Immediately I asked if we could move. The midwife was unsure. People who know me, will know that I’m not particularly argumentative or confrontational. But this was the game changer. I needed to do everything I could to move to that room, now knowing it was available. I was polite, but firm - I wanted to use that room and I could see that it was available. She came back with another colleague and they looked through my notes. Eventually they decided yes, we could have the birth pool room!

Imagine walking past the doors to this…

I couldn’t believe our luck! Straight away, Tim got the snacks out (priorities) and I bounced on a waiting birthing ball. Every time a contraction came, I really needed him now. We stood for each surge, for which I gripped the inside of his elbows and he gently rocked from side to side. The breathing techniques were helping immensely.  Our newly allocated midwife, for the birth, came in to meet us. Her name was Becky and I knew right away that she was going to be perfect for the type of birth we wanted. Her first words were “Oh no, this isn’t how this room is meant to look. Give me 2 minutes!”.  She worked her magic and whizzed around the room, moving furniture and creating spaces that were relaxing, calming and just not what you’d typically expect to find on a delivery unit!

Becky seemed thrilled that I wanted to use the pool. She began to fill it up. In the back of my mind, I wondered how far along I was now, but any number of centimetres didn’t matter. I knew things were progressing nicely – my contractions were getting stronger every time and there seemed to be less time to chat in between. Tim continued to pour Lucozade Sport into my mouth whilst I changed into a bikini top for the pool. That’s the ultimate best drink for labour by the way. Pack 4 bottles in your birth bag.

Once in the pool, I couldn’t believe how relaxing the warm water was. It was so lovely to just let go and sort of flop down into the water. I was so happy that I was actually using a pool. I knew my chances had been slim. Just as I was basking in the glory of things going to plan… BAM.

Birth partner magic…

I had the worst contraction of the entire labour. My first contraction in the water. I think I just assumed that the warm water would help me through the pain and so I didn’t use the deep breathing to the same intensity that I had before getting into the pool. Wow. It took my breath away. Tim reassured me that I was doing just fine, but at this point I started to wonder if hypnobirthing techniques would work enough for me to birth my baby without anything else?  Later, I would learn that this was my transition. I asked for the gas and air to be set up.

Thankfully, the next contraction wasn’t as bad. I’d regained positivity and relaxed and this was all down to my birth partner. He knew what to say and what to do to get me back into that zone. Without him, I wouldn’t have done it. I got through the next 20 minutes or so with the gas and air and some very deep surge breathing, a technique I teach on my course. After every contraction I was completely lapping up the relaxation element of being in the pool. It felt incredible immediately after each pain had gone. I stayed on my knees in the water, leaning against the side of the pool where Tim also knelt, but on the dry side! I needed him completely. He was the wise one, whispering the encouragement, holding it all together. I was in and out of ‘being aware’ I suppose - the hypnobirthing strategies came naturally and I flipped between zoning out for contractions and lapping up the happiness of the moments in between.

Very suddenly, I knew that my body was doing something a bit different. I was instinctively reaching up to Tim, trying to pull myself up. My entire pelvic area was relaxed, but there was the once-felt and therefore always familiar feeling of something moving down. I knew in my head that my body was starting to push. But just as I tried to tell the midwife this, another surge hit. It was an almighty one, a powerful contraction which took my breath away. The gas and air was useful now and just as that contraction came to an end, I was able to look up at Becky. But I didn’t need to say anything.

She already knew. She was talking to me, but I couldn’t hear her. I remember her saying “Ok Samantha, when your baby is born it’s really important to not…”. I knew what she about to say because I teach it… but I still panicked that I didn’t hear the rest before my next contraction.

Tunnel vision

They say that your memory of giving birth can sometimes feel like tunnel vision. I can remember what I could see and how I felt. What I could hear. But there are parts when I know I was so far ‘in the zone’. I didn’t do any of the initial pushing. I felt the baby moving down and I felt my body surge and bear down without my consent! The fetal ejection reflex was in full force.

As I realised what was happening next, Becky was right there telling me what I already knew. I was fully dilated and she could feel the top of the baby’s head. There was no time to celebrate. I saw Tim’s shocked face looking at the clock. I’d only been in the pool for half an hour or so! With one almighty push, the baby’s head was born. This time I was in control. I flashed back to my daughter’s birth and felt the same sense of ‘I need to get this baby out now’. The midwife was asking if I wanted to put my hand down and feel the baby’s head. I did not. With one more gigantic push, he was born.

The first picture of newborn Ellis - taken seconds after he was born.

Sitting in the water with a newborn in my arms felt incredible. As the midwives wrapped us in towels, we looked to find out that it was a boy! We asked for delayed cord clamping, so waited until the cord stopped pulsating until Tim cut it. I stayed in the pool to birth the placenta, having skin to skin with him until I became cold and wanted to retreat to the bed. I couldn’t believe how different an experience this had been compared to my first. Hypnobirthing had helped me hugely with my first labour, but this time luck had been on our side as well as good preparation. Not just luck actually - I knew my options, I knew my rights and I knew I had to repeatedly voice my request for the pool! The golden combination of good birth education, great timing and everything going roughly to plan on the day.

After an overnight stay, we were discharged and headed home so that our eldest could meet her new little brother. I hugged her again. There was no heavy heart now – yes, something had changed, but it was the most wonderful change. Our family was complete! Now for the challenge of tackling the newborn weeks in another major national lockdown. But that’s a tale for another day…

Ellis was born at St Mary’s Hospital, Manchester, with a fantastic team of midwives supporting us on the day. Thank you so much to Becky, our incredible birth midwife, and Leila, the triage midwife who managed to secure the birth pool for us, making our experience one to remember!

Pregnancy In A Pandemic

As one of the Baby & Toddler Show’s resident experts, I’ve put together a post & video about how to get through your pandemic pregnancy. Birth anxiety is at an all time high right now and it’s obvious why. Not only are we dealing with a worldwide, once in a lifetime chaotic event, but whispers and rumours have gone into overdrive in the birthing world. Will I be allowed a birth partner? Will I still be able to have an epidural?

Pop over to my blog post on The Baby & Toddler Show website to find out how I coped and what I’d recommend. You can also view my exclusive video on the show weekends: 6th & 7th February and 6th & 7th March. See the website for further details!

Here’s a picture of me, tired, trying to film myself 12 weeks after giving birth and realising I’ve got a few extra chins.

Only 4% of babies are born on their due date!

Why hasn’t my baby arrived on its due date?

Statistically, only 4% of babies are born on their due date and many healthy babies are born after this.

I often discuss the advantage of planning a meal out or date night on a baby’s due date with my expectant couples. There’s a good chance that you might be able to fulfil your plans, but make sure it’s something easy to cancel if needed.

No matter how reasonable and rational you feel about your due date, it’s completely normal to feel a hint of sadness when your baby doesn’t turn up ‘on schedule’. Think about it - you’ve been waiting for this day for 9 months!

Personally I took delight in going to as many different places on my due date as possible. Feeling huge and waddling like a penguin, I was determined to keep as active as possible and get those last minute bits and pieces from the shops.

The lady on the tills at Dunelm Mill told the entire queue that I was due that day, with a hint of panic as if they might need to run and get some towels any minute. And the waiter in the restaurant that evening couldn’t bring the card machine fast enough when I told her that the baby was fully baked.

Comment below - What have you planned for your due date? Or if your baby has already arrived, did you do anything fun on your estimated due date?

What is an APGAR score?

What is an APGAR Score?

Once your baby is born, the midwives in charge of your care will assess your baby using a scoring system called APGAR. This routine scoring occurs after 60 seconds and again at 5 minutes post birth.

A baby can score between zero and two for each of five criteria (Appearance, Pulse, Grimace, Activity and Respiration) This is added to give a score out of 10.
A score of seven or above is considered normal, and a score below seven is regarded as low.

From the NHS Maternity Statistics 2018-2019, only 1% of the 485,901 term babies (with an APGAR score recorded) had a score below seven.

Research suggests hypnobirthing has significant impact on post natal wellbeing.

Does hypnobirthing work? Is hypnobirthing real?

Yes, it’s my speciality, but I’m proud to say that hypnobirthing can be taught from an evidence based perspective. A three-year NIHR (National Institute for Health Research) funded study into the effectiveness of self-hypnosis during childbirth found that it had a significant impact on the women’s levels of postnatal anxiety and fear about childbirth. There was also a reduction in the number of women taking epidural pain relief whilst using the techniques.

One of the participants, who has since gone onto have another baby and practised self-hypnosis during both pregnancies, commented: “Hypnotherapy is something that I had never considered before. I have an anxious personality and friends had suggested that it might be something that I could try, particularly during labour. The hypnobirthing script provided during the trial was easy to listen to and during the latter stage of my pregnancy I practiced it twice a day. I think that this was the key to it being successful during my labours. I would highly recommend this technique to women as I had big babies and with the help of the hypnobirthing was relaxed and in control. I used gas and air with one labour and nothing with my second.”

Maria Williamson, a Midwife at East Lancashire Hospitals NHS Trust who took part in the study, said: “Women and their families engaged so well with the sessions, you could see their confidence grow. Their ability to remain calm and relaxed enabled them to have a positive birth experience. For me as a midwife, to see a family begin is a privilege but to experience women and their birth companions leaving the sessions not terrified about giving birth, but actually feeling excited about meeting their babies, was truly amazing.”

The only downside to using hypnosis, according to the study, was that maternity staff were less likely to believe a woman was in active labour.

Professor Downe added: “The results suggest that self-hypnosis poses no danger to participants. However, if self-hypnosis is offered to women, maternity care staff will need to be made aware of how relaxed some women can appear when they are using self-hypnosis, even if they are actually in strong labour.”

Birth Bag Bonus Buys - Essentials For A Comfortable Birth

Search the internet these days and you’ll find a whole host of blogs giving you the low down on what to include in your birthing bag. Even birthing units often have a list of their own ‘must haves’ for you to include. But aside from the essentials of clothes, underwear, more underwear and huge maternity pads, what are the secret gems to pack for smooth labour?

1) Pillow and pillowcase

My first top tip is to take your own pillow. Buy a cheapy supermarket one and a simple pillowcase too - You know that in the birthing room things might get messy. Most maternity units supply the essentials, but when it comes to ultimate comfort during labour, having an extra pillow and one that is doused in your ‘anchored scent’ (see number 6!) can help you to feel much more at home and relaxed. Comfort is key.

2) A separate bag for birth and baby

It’s a great idea to have your birthing comforts in a separate bag from your ‘post arrival’ kit. Include one set of newborn clothes and a few nappies in your birthing bag, but keep another bag separately with a few days of supplies for baby. What you think will last a few days may turn out to just be enough for the night, depending on your baby, the season and whether or not it has yet to start filling nappies…

On this note, make sure your birth partner knows where all of the baby supplies are back at home. If you have to stay for some reason, they will be able to go home for more clothes and nappies if needed.

3) Birth comforts

In the birthing bag, pack your room spray and snacks. Plan to take many pairs of underwear then stop, reassess and add some more! If your waters break on the way to the hospital, be aware that they will continue to leak way past that initial ‘gush’ (lovely!) so wear a maternity pad and be prepared for a hospital car park strip off… It’s worth noting too, that having some towels in the car to sit on is well advised!

Also in your birth bag you’ll want to make sure you have a portable bluetooth speaker. Some maternity units, especially midwife led units, have ipod docks and other accessories, but if you should be moved to a consultant led unit for any reason, you’ll need your own way of continuing to play your hypnobirthing MP3s or relaxing playlist.

4) Snacks

Labour is like a marathon - we need to prepare accordingly and fuel our body throughout. Sometimes you won’t feel like eating much, but if and when you do, you should indulge. Think dried fruit, nut mixes and energy balls over sweets and chocolate. Simple, healthy sandwiches on wholemeal bread will give you a slow release of energy and help you to steer clear of exhaustion.

Be wary of fizzy drinks and stick to still energising options. I’d never drink it in my day to day life but Lucozade Sport (non-fizzy version) was recommended to me before my labour. Much to my surprise, the 2 midwives overseeing my induction were happy to see I’d brought supplies of it and allowed me to drink it throughout, despite only really being allowed to have water because of the syntocinon drip. They said it was ‘the best thing’ for labour.

5) Games

I’m not saying that ‘Deadly Disease Top Trumps’ was a bad idea, but the consultant definitely raised an eyebrow at our choice of card game to take to a hospital. That said, it is definitely advisable to take at least 5 or 6 different ideas for games / distraction during labour. At times, labour is boring. The time between contractions can be spent in self-hypnosis, if hypnobirthing, or it could just be spent chatting with your birth partner and the midwives.

Labour is one of those times where you can be feeling absolutely great one minute and highly irritable the next. Taking a range of games (think playing cards, uno, top trumps etc) and things to do (if you’re a keen knitter, knock yourself out!) means that the minute you get bored, you’ll always have something else on your list to jump to. The same goes for movies or box sets. If you’re planning a Netflix & Birth session, make sure your birth partner knows that they might not get to finish each episode… You’re in labour, you’re in control.

6) Anchored scent

During my hypnobirthing courses, I talk about having an anchored scent. This is perhaps an essential oil or a room spray used whilst you are relaxing. If you relax whilst smelling the scent, then your brain makes the association between that scent and feeling relaxed. This association ‘strengthens’ and ultimately, the process will start to work both ways. Spraying the scent around will eventually result in a feeling of relaxation.

It’s important to choose a scent that is suitable for pregnancy. On my course you’ll learn how to effectively anchor this for deep relaxation and how to use this to your benefit during labour for added comfort. Don’t forget to take the room spray or essential oils with you to the hospital and make sure your birth partner knows which pocket of the bag it is stored in! You’ll be needing this throughout for a calm and relaxed birth.

What are your birth bag essentials? Let me know in the comments below! As always, feel free to leave questions too.

Sam x

More Events!

I’m delighted that I’ve been invited back to Mamas and Papas at The Trafford Centre in Manchester to speak at their February Parent-To-Be events! I was really impressed at the special offers available on the day - some of the discounts are really good (and I’m not even paid to say that!) The events start at 10.30am and there are usually a few talks available - hypnobirthing, water babies swimming, baby first aid, car seat safety advice, safe sleep etc. Refreshments are provided and all attendees are given a goody bag full of offers and helpful bits and pieces.

I’ll be the guest speaker at the hypnobirthing stand on Sunday 17th and Sunday 24th February. If you want to find out more about my courses and what hypnobirthing is / how it can help you, book a free spot on the event and come and say hello!

Link for tickets!

My Journey Started At The Hairdressers...

…12 weeks pregnant, sucking on ginger biscuits in front of the huge salon mirror, reassuring myself I wasn’t going to be sick into a bin before the stylist had finished her job. She asked me if I’d thought about hypnobirthing. The truth was, I hadn’t even thought about birthing! Getting pregnant had been a long and difficult journey and that had been my only focus. This was the first time I’d paused and thought about actually pushing the thing out. I googled, researched and enquired about a hypnobirthing course before I even left the building…

And a year later, 6 months after the birth of my own baby, I was in a different salon chair. A different hairdresser too, pregnant with her first child. She didn’t have to say anything - the worry, the fear, the anxiety, the unknown… it was all written on her face. I told her about the wonders of hypnobirthing and how the course I’d taken had really helped to settle my nerves and stay positive… but she already knew about the course and had signed up herself just a few days before.

Though I knew she’d enjoy the course, I left feeling angry and annoyed inside; fed up that so many women end up in a situation where they face worry and fear around their birth. Too many horror stories told, too many ‘you won’t possibly understand until you’ve experienced it’ conversations. Too many negative thoughts about labour in a woman’s head by the time she is of childbearing age. It’s no wonder that women are scared of the pain of childbirth - it’s all we hear from the early days. And if we don’t hear it, we feel it in the voices of those who have experienced it before us. That overwhelming feeling of ‘you haven’t done it, so you can’t possibly know’ that shades every conversation between a new-mum-to-be and an experienced pusher (or worse - a group of them!)

My crew!

I couldn’t stand it when I was pregnant and, sitting in that chair in front of the worried young girl, I decided that I had to do something, even if it only helped a handful of people. I decided that I wanted to help others to prepare for the birth of their baby in the way I did. Women deserve to feel prepared and positive about birth. They also deserve to know and understand the choices they have in regards to their labour, antenatal and postnatal care. I think we can all agree that the labouring woman has most of the work to do, but nobody ever seems to think of the birth partner! In films and on TV they are seen as the ‘hand holder’ or the ‘bystander’. Birth partners deserve more than this too - they can learn, with hypnobirthing, to actively support the labouring woman with her techniques. There’s only so much mopping of the brow that can feel useful, surely? Birth partners experience such an overwhelmingly emotional event yet don't always get the chance to feel fully part of the process or feel truly helpful. I know of one dad who took my course who was told by the midwives that he should consider a career move into midwifery! Whoever your birth partner might be, they too can benefit from using hypnobirthing and feel fully prepared to act as your advocate on the day.

The clinical bright lights and cattle-market feel to the hospital’s basic antenatal class - the basic biscuits, cold plastic chairs and pain relief video (with little chance to ask questions or discuss pros and cons) - it just wasn’t for me. Experiencing all this, I decided to train as a hypnobirthing instructor, offering full antenatal classes and private instruction to women and their birth partners across Greater Manchester. And so far, so good! My clients have given me fantastic feedback and my sessions remain fun, friendly and informative. I’ve even been asked to attend births with my clients which is such a great honour.

If you’ve read this far and you’re still intrigued then you’ve come to the right place. Have a look around my website and discover more about hypnobirthing. Get in touch, connect with me on Facebook, Instagram or via email or book a course today. I can’t wait to be part of your journey and help you to have a positive and calm birth experience.

Mamas and Papas Manchester Events

Exciting news!

I’ve been asked to guest speak at the Manchester Mamas and Papas store during their January Parent-to-be events! I’ll be giving presentations on hypnobirthing, answering questions on all things antenatal and sharing some inspiring positive birth stories.

The events are happening on Sunday 20th January and Sunday 27th January between 10.30am and 12.30pm.

If you’re expecting, I’d love to see you there!

The Manchester Mamas and Papas store can be found in the intu Trafford Centre.

Details and tickets for the events can be found here!